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Worlds Dumbest Criminals
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Recycled1Offline
Great Old One
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
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PostPosted: 05-04-2012 06:39    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ronson8 wrote:
Monstrosa wrote:
Yes, both hair and nails sre made from keratin.

I remember being taught that at school but misheard it as carrot tin, I was quite confused for a while.


Laughing Perhaps we could do with a "Childhood Misheard Words" thread.
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ramonmercadoOffline
Psycho Punk
Joined: 19 Aug 2003
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PostPosted: 27-04-2012 19:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
'Stupid' criminal stole empty cash box from security man
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/ireland/2012/0427/1224315234279.html

Fri, Apr 27, 2012

A “stupid” criminal was found in his home with security dye on his hands after stealing an empty cash box.

Lawrence Smith (46) had drank seven cans of cider on a bench before he approached a security man, threatened him and stole the cash box.

Smith, of Grosvenor Park, Rathmines, Dublin, pleaded guilty at Dublin Circuit Criminal Court to stealing a cash box from G-Force Security at South Great George’s Street on March 23th, 2011.

Judge Martin Nolan imposed a three-year sentence, which he suspended in full after asking: “Is it a mitigating factor that the criminal is stupid?”

Garda Dan Barry told prosecuting counsel Monika Leech that G-Force Security was placing money in an ATM at South Great George’s Street. A security man was returning to the van with an empty cash box when Smith approached him, and said: “Give me the f***ing cash box, buddy.”

Smith, who has 15 previous convictions, got into a taxi and placed the box in the boot of the car and asked the taxi man to drive him home. The taxi driver became suspicious and contacted gardaí.
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Heckler20Offline
The Sockpuppet of
Joined: 16 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 01-05-2012 11:38    Post subject: Reply with quote

ramonmercado wrote:
stealing a cash box from G-Force Security


Wonder if it was Tiny, he was always the rubbish member of the team, Jason or Mark would've 'Transmuted' and kicked his ass.
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ramonmercadoOffline
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PostPosted: 25-07-2012 12:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Man (43) jailed for armed robbery attempts
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/ireland/2012/0725/1224320762505.html
Wed, Jul 25, 2012

A MAN who tried to rob a building society while posing as a wheelchair-bound woman has been jailed for this and another attempted robbery.

Thomas Clark (43) arrived at the building society unshaven and wearing a poor-quality black wig. He was being pushed in the wheelchair by an accomplice, Martin Collins (21). Collins had previously made an appointment with the manager on the pretence that a woman he was caring for had been awarded €2.9 million by the State and wanted to invest it.

Det Garda Sgt Peter Woods told Dara Hayes, prosecuting, that the building society manager Michael Doyle noticed the “woman” was wearing what was obviously a black wig when Collins pushed her into his office. Collins left the wheelchair facing the door, which Mr Doyle thought strange.

Clark got out of the wheelchair and produced what Mr Doyle thought was a shotgun. Then he noticed it was a man dressed as a woman. Clark shouted “Get down on the floor” but Mr Doyle realised the weapon was an imitation gun. Collins produced a similar weapon but this was a hatchet made to look like a gun.

Det Sgt Woods said Mr Doyle then shouted at the raiders: “Would you ever f**k off” before telling them to “stop being stupid”.

Collins struck Mr Doyle on the back of the leg, causing him to bleed, before the robbers ran from the building society empty-handed to a waiting car and sped towards Blackrock.

Gardaí arrested them a short time later. Both Collins, Neilstown Gardens, Clondalkin, and Clark, Keeper Road, Crumlin, and Chaplains Place, Clondalkin, pleaded guilty at Dublin Circuit Criminal Court to attempted robbery at Permanent TSB on Lower Kilmacud Road, Stillorgan, on October 20th, 2010.

Clark also pleaded guilty to the attempted robbery of the EBS in Leixlip the following day. The court heard while running to escape gardaí, Clark jumped into the river Liffey and tried to swim across it.

Judge Martin Nolan sentenced Clark to consecutive prison terms totalling six years but suspended the final two on strict conditions.

He accepted Clark was “to some degree institutionalised and has not had the best start in life”.

In February, Judge Nolan jailed Collins for three years for his role in the crime. The court heard Collins had 55 previous convictions, while Clark had 33. Both were drug addicts at the time.
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Father_TedOffline
Yeti
Joined: 02 May 2012
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PostPosted: 23-10-2012 09:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

Man with ridiculous disguise arrested at bank after 'fraud attempt'

A 30-year-old man was detained by police earlier this year after he apparently wore one of the worse disguises ever when allegedly trying to commit fraud.

Joshua K. Pinney is alleged to have walked into a branch of Bank of America in Washington wearing a less than convincing bandage around his head and a neck brace and fake goatee.

He reportedly claimed he had just been in an accident and required a new debit card.

Needless to say the branch manager was apparently less than convinced and notified police straight away.

KOMO News said when the officers arrived they checked the Oregon ID and asked Mr Pinney whether he was being serious as he didn’t look anything like the man in the photo.

According to court papers the accused then looked up and said 'I know'.

It apparently got even more embarrassing for Mr Pinney as he is said to have blamed the idea for the scheme on his 'computer expert' girlfriend, who he met while on prison work release in 2011.

He then allegedly admitted his brother's friend gave him the stolen ID and he hadn’t really been in an accident and the neck brace was a fake.

The 30-year-old may have a reason to come up with a new disguise now as he missed his recent court date in relation to the second-degree identity theft charge he received after the incident and is a wanted man.

Link: http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/915583-man-with-ridiculous-disguise-arrested-at-bank-after-fraud-attempt

The photo that accompanies this story is priceless!
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MythopoeikaOffline
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PostPosted: 23-10-2012 18:29    Post subject: Reply with quote

Down with this sort of thing! Very Happy
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Father_TedOffline
Yeti
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PostPosted: 24-10-2012 11:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

Careful now!
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Black River FallsOffline
I wear a fez now.
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PostPosted: 24-10-2012 17:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don;t have the patience right now to google for it, but there is footage somewhere on t'internet of a man trying to rob a bank disguised as a shrub... it is hands down the crappest disguise ever. Laughing
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Spudrick68Offline
Great Old One
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PostPosted: 24-10-2012 19:18    Post subject: Reply with quote

Is this it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IIk8wGdgBQ
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Ronson8Offline
Things can only get better.
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PostPosted: 24-10-2012 21:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

Was it his own bank branch that he tried to rob? Smile
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monopsOffline
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PostPosted: 25-10-2012 13:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

He just wanted to take the money and leaf...
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Ronson8Offline
Things can only get better.
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PostPosted: 25-10-2012 17:38    Post subject: Reply with quote

But the staff soon twigged he was quite barking.
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monopsOffline
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PostPosted: 25-10-2012 18:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

And rapidly got to the root of the matter.
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WhistlingJackOffline
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PostPosted: 14-11-2012 13:15    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
9 November 2012 Last updated at 15:15

Bank robber 'robbed guard on way into bank with empty cash box'

A bank robber struck too early and stole an empty cashbox from a security guard on his way into a bank, Belfast Crown Court has heard.


Joseph O'Callaghan, 31, of Gleann Si, Rostrevor, was jailed for nine years for robbery and possessing a knife in public on 8 April 2011.

"It is amazing that you can do all this planning and you decide to attack the man when he is going into the bank as opposed to waiting until he comes out," the judge told him.

"It shows the level of intellect we are dealing with."

Belfast Crown Court heard that at 11:20 BST on 8 April 2011, a security guard left his van and was walking into the Northern Bank on Belfast's Lisburn Road when a large knife was "brandished" in his face.

A prosecuting lawyer said CCTV showed O'Callaghan getting out of a parked car, running to the guard and threatening him with the knife before lifting the box and getting back into the car which then sped off.

Shortly afterwards the car was found burnt out near Divis Street and the lawyer said police enquiries led them to O'Callaghan.

When he was arrested, police noted that he had purple dye on his fingers, the same type of dye used in cash security boxes.

The box, which turned out to be empty, was recovered from a flat.

O'Callaghan's defence lawyer said while there was clearly an element of planning involved, the fact that he robbed the guard on his way into the bank indicated the "level of professionalism" attached to the case.

Handing down the nine-year term, the judge said that in an effort to protect cash-in-transit guards, deterrent sentences would be handed down.

She ordered that O'Callaghan spend four years in jail and five on licence

BBC © 2012
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SameOldVardoger
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Location: Scandinavia
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PostPosted: 04-12-2012 16:12    Post subject: Teen bank robber brags about crime on YouTube video Reply with quote

Quote:

Teen bank robber from Nebraska brags about crime on YouTube video
The self-described ‘Chick bank robber’ flashed her stolen loot on video – now she faces time behind bars.
Comments (10)
By Victoria Cavaliere / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS
Published: Tuesday, December 4, 2012, 8:38 AM
Updated: Tuesday, December 4, 2012, 8:38 AM
Print

Print
Comment

Jellee Beanie via YouTube

Hannah Sabata of Stromsburg was arrested after posting this video where she brags about a bank robbery. She was even wearing the same clothes as she wore to carry out the crime, authorities said.

A brazen Nebraska bank robbery ended with the arrest of a teenage girl who boasted on YouTube about carrying out the crime.

Hannah Sabata, 19, faces theft and robbery charges in connection with the Nov. 28 holdup at a Cornerstone Bank in Waco, Neb. Sabata was also allegedly driving a stolen car, what she described as a “shiny” Pontiac Grand Am.

The teen doesn’t speak during the eight minute video, but instead holds up handwritten signs about her alleged crimes and then fans out a stack of cash.

The title of the video is “Chick bank robber,” and the description says “I just stole a car and robbed a bank. Now I'm rich, I can pay off my college financial aid and tomorrow I’m going for a shopping spree.”
Hannah Sabata
York County Sheriff's Dept.
Hannah Sabata of Stromsburg was arrested last week in connection with a robbery at a Cornerstone Bank in Waco

But those grand plans were foiled by Sabata’s almost comically bad judgment, including wearing the same clothes in the video that she wore to rob the bank of more than $6,000, police said.
Bank Robber
Jellee Beanie via YouTube
Fanning out some $6,000 in stolen cash.

The suspect pointed what appeared to be a gun and handed tellers a note that said “You are being robbed! NO ALARMS OR LOCKS OR PHONES or INK BAGS! I have a loaded gun. You have 2 minutes,” deputies told NTV.

It was unclear how Sabata intends to plead. The name of her attorney was not immediately known.

In her accidental confession video, Sabata is seen sitting on the floor of what appears to be a bedroom with the band Green Day playing in the background. She says the gun she brandished was fake and she holds up a sign to the camera saying "I told my mom today was the best day of my life... she just thinks I met a new boy."

She also indicates that she had just smoked marijuana and would be able to buy more with her newfound cash.

Sabata also makes an excuse for the crimes, saying the government took her baby away and that the "system is a game."
Bank Robber
Jellee Beanie via YouTube


Authorities have recovered all but $30 of the stolen funds, local media reported. The video will be used as part of the evidence against her, law enforcement said.

Bond was set at $300,000.

Her next court appearance is set for Dec. 26.

WATCH: 'Chick bank robber' confession

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/teen-brags-youtube-bank-robbery-article-1.1212976#ixzz2E6GGKuIy


Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAZoo5KRMZ4&feature=player_embedded
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