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Posted: 31-12-2007 22:38 Post subject: Humour and Jokes

All the good old threads on this keep evaporating, so I'm adding a pointless poll to try to sticky this one...

For starters, an Irish Joke (at least, I assume it was a tongue-in-cheek joke):-

I was searching Google Maps, and discovered that in Kinsale (on the south coast of Ireland) there is a place called....

Scilly Walk!

[Geographical footnote: The Isles off Scilly, off Cornwall, are SE of Kinsale, and probably one of the closest UK places to that town.]

Posted: 31-12-2007 22:51 Post subject:

On my beat here in sunny Northampton, theres a narrow lane called Danes Back Passage Embarassed

Posted: 01-01-2008 12:45 Post subject:

Well, I just watched a DVD of Adam Hills (Australian Comedian and TV Show Host) filmed in a hall in Pakenham, Victoria, where it was discovered that there was an adjacent suburb called Pakenham Upper.

Posted: 02-01-2008 07:44 Post subject:

Posted: 02-01-2008 09:11 Post subject:

Just outside of Weston-Super-Mare there's a village called Uphill. The local horticultural society has, for a few years now, been called... The Uphill Horticultural Society. Prior to this? "The Uphill Gardeners Club".

Similarly, I know a teacher by the name of Mr Hankie. He only got mildly ribbed until South Park came along - imagine walking into a classroom and all the inmates, in unison, bellowing "Howwwwdy-hoooo!". Poor bastard Very Happy

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Posted: 02-01-2008 19:52 Post subject:

Giant knickers put out house fire

A family home was saved from burning down when a pair of giant knickers were used to put out a fire.
Jenny Marsey's size 18-20 cotton pants were a lifesaver when they were grabbed to cover a frying pan fire at her home in Meryl Gardens, Hartlepool, Teesside.

Her son and nephew were trying to fry some bread when the blaze broke out.

But the quick-thinking pair used the Marks & Spencer underwear from a pile of washing, doused them in water, and threw them over the fire.

Mrs Marsey, 53, said: "My £4.99 parachute knickers have come in handy for something. We've had a good laugh that they were a bit like a fire blanket."

The incident happened on Sunday, while Mrs Marsey was out for the day.

Her son John and his cousin Darren, 23, were cooking, when they went to answer a knock at the door, only to return to a blazing kitchen.

Mrs Marsey said: "When they found the pan on fire they did what most people do and panicked.

"But they found a pair of my knickers in a washing basket and basically used them as a fire blanket to put out the fire."

Mrs Marsey, who is also mother to Sarah, 23, Joanne, 24, and Donna, 27, added: "I think if they had been my daughter Sarah's skimpy knickers they wouldn't have done any good.

"I'm taking it all in my stride and it's quite a funny start to the New Year."

A spokesman for Cleveland Fire Brigade said: "They did the right thing in the end. We advise everyone to get fire safety advice."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tees/7167549.stm

Very Happy

Posted: 02-01-2008 21:18 Post subject:

Urgent inquiry into rail delays

Many people were expected to return to work on Wednesday
An urgent inquiry is to be carried out into engineering work delays which have caused chaos for thousands of people.
The Office of Rail Regulation began the inquiry after West Coast Mainline work overran by two days. Disruption was set to continue on Thursday.

............

Network Rail apologised for the delays and said it was working "flat out" to restore normal services.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7167073.stm

According to Channel 4 news, this nonsense has earned the company the nick-name

Not Work Rail! Very Happy

Posted: 02-01-2008 21:56 Post subject:

Oh my poor sides. Rolling Eyes

Posted: 03-01-2008 10:41 Post subject:

according to this mornings metro its

"network fail"

Posted: 03-01-2008 11:52 Post subject:

Stop, please, while I can still breathe!

"Network Rail" is also an anagram of "Lo! Train Wrek", and also of "Workin' later", which could explain the delays.

Posted: 03-01-2008 12:12 Post subject:

Posted: 03-01-2008 13:16 Post subject:

R.E. amusing streets/places:

Percy Passage in the West End of London.

Posted: 05-01-2008 11:25 Post subject:

From http://www.worldwidewords.org/nl/jgdq.htm

Deborah Lake wrote ... our local rural Northumberland newspaper has a young reporter who has spent his whole life in London. Telephoned with the information that the Grace Darling Museum at Bamburgh was about to re-open on 18 December after refurbishment, he spent some time wondering why the local population should have a museum devoted to the grey starling.”

Posted: 06-01-2008 05:55 Post subject:

There's a crotch crescent in Oxford.

RE: the original poll. No, I don't.

Posted: 06-01-2008 13:21 Post subject:

My favourite place name is Firkin Point, just on the shores of Loch Lomond.

The bloke and I have the inevitable conversation about "FFS, will you get to the Firkin Point?" each time we pass the place.

Himself wanted to take a pic of me with the sign (captioned "At last, Fizz gets to the Firkin Point") when we passed it a couple of days ago, but it was snowing and I'm too nesh.