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theyithian Keeping the British end up
Joined: 29 Oct 2002 Total posts: 11704 Location: Vermilion Sands Gender: Unknown |
 Posted: 30-03-2005 17:00 Post subject: |
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| RainyOcean wrote: | | I wonder if that psycho who did "Rock and Roll McDonalds" got anything from the company. |
Wesley Willis. Legend!
(And no, as he's dead)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wesley_Willis |
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RainyOcean Alien Kitty
Peek-A-Boo Joined: 19 May 2004 Total posts: 2006 Location: In my basement making a suit out of human skin Age: 31 Gender: Female |
| Posted: 31-03-2005 07:50 Post subject: |
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| He really was diagnosed with schizophrenia? Did not know that. Didn't know he was dead either. Seriously, wasn't trying to insult people with mental disorders by calling him a psycho. Did not know he was schizophrenic. |
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| Anonymous |
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| rynner Location: Still above sea level Gender: Male |
| Posted: 01-02-2006 09:11 Post subject: |
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About time we rattled this cage again!
| Quote: | Land of the McFree
By Harry Wallop (Filed: 31/01/2006)
Harry Wallop, the Daily Telegraph's retail correspondent, is immersing himself in McCulture after being invited to spend a few days at the global headquarters of McDonald's in Illinois
Monday, January 30
Oak Brook, Illinois is the home of McDonald's and it's hard to escape the influence of Ronald McDonald in this part of North America. The manager of my hotel is wearing an I'm Lovin' it T-shirt, I'm staying just along the road from McDonald's plaza and my breakfast options stretch from a sausage egg McGriddle to a latte from the McCafe.
McDonald's has had a torrid few years, buffeted by books, TV shows and films, especially Morgan Spurlock's highly entertaining Supersize Me, that have portrayed the company as the source of some of the world's worst ills such as obesity, animal cruelty and employee exploitation. Customers deserted the chain and in 2003 the corporation recorded its first ever quarterly loss.
But things are changing. And I'm part of a delegation of journalists from around the world invited to McDonald's global headquarters to be shown the re-found swagger of the company.
First stop is a brand new McDonald's restaurant with McCafe attached on the main interstate between downtown Chicago and Ronald HQ in Oak Brook. While the open fire, newspapers, proper coffee and cinnamon swirls at the McCafe look appealing, I decide that fried meat is what made Ronald McDonald the second most recognised figure behind Santa Claus and it is only fair to order a sausage egg McGriddle.
Adan, my server, is looking flustered. As part of the new transparency at the company his average serving time is flashed up on the cash register. And thanks to the influx of poncy journalists ordering the complicated apple salad his is reading 37 seconds - a full 11 seconds behind company's best practice. "I'm working on getting it down, I'm working on it," he says. Of course every second he can shave off means extra profit margin for McDonald's, which monitors every restaurant task minutely.
The McGriddle is not a success. It is so soaked in over-sweet maple syrup and other unmentionables that I am forced to abandon it after one mouthful. I feel even more queasy after I examine the nutrition chart, now helpfully printed on the back of every paper tray cover. It comes in at 560 calories, with 32 grams of fat (49pc of my daily recommended value).
As my arteries contract we are ushered (by the uber efficient McDonald's corporate PR women wearing stop-watches around their neck) on to the bus to visit the famous McDonald's Hamburger University. Here workers practice serving Big Macs in mock up kitchens using wooden burgers, with cotton wool standing in for the McFlurry and candy for the French fries. It's like a supersized Early Learning Centre kitchen.
We're shown around by the Diana Thomas, the "Dean of Hamburger University", who has skilfully persuaded the US government to grant the glorified training course a quasi-degree status, giving it 46 college credits (the equivalent of a year and half of a University degree). She warns me that she's working on getting the UK Hamburger University in Finchley recognised by the Government.
The University may look like a glorified play school but it is deadly serious. Every single manager of a US McDonald's trains here, becoming a Bachelor in Hamburgerology (yes, really) and he learns "to walk the talk" as McDonald's chief executive Jim Skinner says. [  ]
Skinner is bullish form, after overseeing 32 consecutive months of same-store sales growth. He's the architect of the McDonald's turnaround and while Europe, and the UK particularly is struggling, the rest of the world, especially Asia and Latin America, is Lovin' his salads, rice burgers and coconut water.
Privately, the McDonald's executives are seething about "sneaky" Morgan Spurlock, who they claim hoodwinked the public into thinking McDonald's was poisonous. In public they don't even mention his name, instead emphasising "healthy lifestyle balance" options available to ordinary diners.
Skinner says: "I eat McDonald's every day. I'm not suggesting I'm some example of a specimen. But I'm 61 and I do exercise. You can eat three times a day at McDonald's and be responsible. We're not out here to be proscriptive."
As if to prove the point, we round off the day with perhaps the weirdest meal I've ever eaten - and I've eaten live eel, mind you. It's dubbed McGourmet and it's a 10-course banquet of dishes all prepared using ingredients found in a standard McDonald's. It includes such delicacies as a Big Tasty Meatloaf with cream cheese sauce and a Coca-Cola reduction and a McCrispy Chicken confitted in citrus sauce. It's strangely convincing and yet very, very, odd. A bit like the folk at Oak Brook, Illinois.
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| Rubyait Great Old One Joined: 10 Sep 2004 Total posts: 1783 Location: Not telling Gender: Unknown |
| Posted: 01-02-2006 22:14 Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Adan, my server, is looking flustered. As part of the new transparency at the company his average serving time is flashed up on the cash register. |
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| bazizmaduno Great Old One Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Total posts: 314 Gender: Unknown |
| Posted: 01-02-2006 22:44 Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | we round off the day with perhaps the weirdest meal I've ever eaten - and I've eaten live eel, mind you. It's dubbed McGourmet and it's a 10-course banquet of dishes all prepared using ingredients found in a standard McDonald's. It includes such delicacies as a Big Tasty Meatloaf with cream cheese sauce and a Coca-Cola reduction and a McCrispy Chicken confitted in citrus sauce. |
F*CK - sorry people! I've just spewed-up on my keyboard...
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| mejane1 miaow, miaow... purrrr Joined: 17 Jan 2002 Total posts: 1637 Gender: Unknown |
| Posted: 01-02-2006 22:54 Post subject: |
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I expect to get shot down in flames here and have my coat ready... but does anyone else miss the days when you could go into a fast-food burger place (I hesitate to use the term restaurant) and just get a burger?
I don't want a McSalad or a McShake or a McPie... just sell me a burger! And no I don't want fries with that. Or a choice of breads and a bewildering selecting of coffees. Which part of "fast" didn't you understand?
Umm.... sorry, can some kind soul direct me to the rant thread?
Jane. |
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| ArthurASCII Hello Playmates
Cheeky chappie Joined: 26 Feb 2002 Total posts: 2893 Location: Letsbe Avenue Age: 59 Gender: Male |
| Posted: 02-02-2006 07:50 Post subject: |
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| mejane1 wrote: | | I expect to get shot down in flames here and have my coat ready... but does anyone else miss the days when you could go into a fast-food burger place (I hesitate to use the term restaurant) and just get a burger? |
Burger King will still meet your needs. There's nothing better than a Double whopper.
I love fast food, as does the rest of the ASCII family. We manage to eat a healthy amount of it as part of our balanced diet. We are all normally-sized people (not a bunch of Pilsbury Doughboys as might be thought).
Food fascists and fashion police seem determined to limit my choice of food to their dictated preferences.
No way...BRING ON THE BURGERS! |
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| RainyOcean Alien Kitty
Peek-A-Boo Joined: 19 May 2004 Total posts: 2006 Location: In my basement making a suit out of human skin Age: 31 Gender: Female |
| Posted: 04-02-2006 23:50 Post subject: |
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| I could point out that just because you're a healthy size doesn't mean it isn't doing damage to your insides. |
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| QuaziWashboard Geriatric, Reeking of Urine, Senile,
Great Old One Joined: 07 Dec 2005 Total posts: 573 Location: Right behind you. Age: 47 Gender: Male |
| Posted: 05-02-2006 10:22 Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Adan, my server, is looking flustered. As part of the new transparency at the company his average serving time is flashed up on the cash register. And thanks to the influx of poncy journalists ordering the complicated apple salad his is reading 37 seconds - a full 11 seconds behind company's best practice. "I'm working on getting it down, I'm working on it," he says. Of course every second he can shave off means extra profit margin for McDonald's, which monitors every restaurant task minutely. |
So how come it takes at least 10 minutes to get served with a Plain Burger (just the burger and the bread) Happy Meal and a Plain Quarter Pounder Meal? If it's less complicated, surely it shouldn't take as long? |
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| Anonymous |
| Posted: 05-02-2006 10:44 Post subject: |
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| QuaziWashboard wrote: |
So how come it takes at least 10 minutes to get served with a Plain Burger (just the burger and the bread) Happy Meal and a Plain Quarter Pounder Meal? If it's less complicated, surely it shouldn't take as long? |
Hello! I'm a cook at a restaraunt (definitely not McD's) and I believe I can shed a little light on this conundrum. The thing is, any 'special order' will take a bit longer because we get into routines when we prepare food and any break in that routine, especially in high volume restaraunts where you actually have to prepare food faster than you can think, slows the process down. Granted, a Wasabi Tuna Salad, or fried Tilapia with lentils and yoghurt sauce, is a bit more complex than a meat patty and some buns, but then again most McD's employees are kids, not professional cooks.
Vegans, while I appreciate their dedication, cause us the most headaches.
"They don't want parmesan in their salad? Ok.. what about the Champagne honey mustard dressing. That has honey... are they ok with honey??!!??" |
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| ArthurASCII Hello Playmates
Cheeky chappie Joined: 26 Feb 2002 Total posts: 2893 Location: Letsbe Avenue Age: 59 Gender: Male |
| Posted: 05-02-2006 17:18 Post subject: |
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| RainyOcean wrote: | | I could point out that just because you're a healthy size doesn't mean it isn't doing damage to your insides. |
You just have!
doesn't mean it is either. The occasional burger as part of a balanced diet is a treat to be welcomed.
I'm sure that my digestive system is robust enough to process a beefburger without "damage to my insides" What is this terrible damage that I've been subjecting myself to for the last 51 years? Somehow, Mrs ASCII and I still manage to complete a long distance walk at least once a fortnight (42km'ish).
"Exercise well and eat heartily" that's my motto. Don't be frightened; give it a try.
Oh well. I'm off out for a twilight walk with Scruffy my dog. I think I'll treat myself to a KFC when we get back.
Toodle pip  |
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| theyithian Keeping the British end up
Joined: 29 Oct 2002 Total posts: 11704 Location: Vermilion Sands Gender: Unknown |
| Posted: 05-02-2006 17:27 Post subject: |
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| ArthurASCII wrote: |
Oh well. I'm off out for a twilight walk with Scruffy my dog. I think I'll treat myself to a KFC when we get back.
Toodle pip |
KFC was the last one i kicked before turning veggie. Tricky, as it was part of my drunken routine to redecorate my face and clothing with a Zinger Tower Burger. I hadn't had any of the other junk for years but still had an insatiable taste for the Colonel... That said, it is bloody salty food. But, yeah, of course you're talking sense: every now and again's fine. |
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| QuaziWashboard Geriatric, Reeking of Urine, Senile,
Great Old One Joined: 07 Dec 2005 Total posts: 573 Location: Right behind you. Age: 47 Gender: Male |
| Posted: 07-02-2006 09:39 Post subject: |
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| volshebnik wrote: | | QuaziWashboard wrote: |
So how come it takes at least 10 minutes to get served with a Plain Burger (just the burger and the bread) Happy Meal and a Plain Quarter Pounder Meal? If it's less complicated, surely it shouldn't take as long? |
Hello! I'm a cook at a restaraunt (definitely not McD's) and I believe I can shed a little light on this conundrum. The thing is, any 'special order' will take a bit longer because we get into routines when we prepare food and any break in that routine, especially in high volume restaraunts where you actually have to prepare food faster than you can think, slows the process down. Granted, a Wasabi Tuna Salad, or fried Tilapia with lentils and yoghurt sauce, is a bit more complex than a meat patty and some buns, but then again most McD's employees are kids, not professional cooks.
Vegans, while I appreciate their dedication, cause us the most headaches.
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Hi volshebnik.
I asked a mate of mine who does work at McDs the same question and he says that it's because those particular orders haven't already been made up first thing in the morning and left to keep warm for hours on end so that they can just serve them straight to me. He says they have to make me a fresh one.  |
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| barfing_pumpkin A pumpkin that pukes. Yes. I am.
Great Old One Joined: 06 Aug 2005 Total posts: 885 Location: Hampshire Age: 41 Gender: Male |
| Posted: 07-02-2006 13:21 Post subject: |
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The problem I have with McDonald's, BK et al is the same one that bugged the Michael Douglas character in falling down: namely, that the 'food' just doesn't look they way it is advertised. Slimy burgers (in texture, probably the equivalent of a toad's back but without the added fun of the hallucinogen), nasty limp lettuce, a single, stranded slice of gherkin that appears so sorry for itself, and soggy buns. Ugh! No, if I want a burger, I'll do something homemade - a big, fat minty lambburger on fresh salad, with some nice Cheshire cheese crumbled over the top (which is far, far superior to that monstrous 'processed cheese food' that they use for the cheeseburgers), stuffed into a home-baked bun. Expensive? Not a bit of it - in the long run, it's even cheaper than the takeaways.
Oh, and those McDonalds 'apple pies': how can they serve what amounts to a small apple-flavoured pop-tart and yet not get prosecuted under the trades descripion act?
In truth, McDonalds and its ilk are simply highly successful marketing excercises. The food is crap, yet somehow they have managed to con pretty much everyone into thinking it's something wonderful. Recurring net profit is also gained by the amount of addictive MSG, sugar and 'refined corn syrup' that they inject into their products - just the stuff you need to get the kiddies clamouring (for clamouring, read: screaming the bloody house down for a 'happy meal') for more! |
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