Forums

 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages 
Weird Sex II
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 10, 11, 12 ... 23, 24, 25  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Fortean Times Message Board Forum Index -> The Human Condition
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Ronson8Offline
Things can only get better.
Joined: 31 Jul 2001
Total posts: 5945
Location: MK
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 13-11-2013 09:46    Post subject: Reply with quote

Other uses for fire extinguishers.
http://metro.co.uk/2013/11/12/premier-inn-guest-hurled-racist-abuse-with-fire-extinguisher-hose-up-his-bottom-4184507/
Back to top
View user's profile 
OneWingedBirdOffline
Freelance Subversive
Joined: 19 Nov 2012
Total posts: 1870
Location: Attice of blinkey lights
Age: 45
Gender: Female
PostPosted: 13-11-2013 13:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
And her chest appeared before my eyes like a slow-motion shot of a natural phenomenon in a television documentary.


Laughing
Back to top
View user's profile 
JamesWhiteheadOffline
Piffle Prospector
Joined: 02 Aug 2001
Total posts: 5725
Location: Manchester, UK
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 14-11-2013 17:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's in Breaking News and maybe it should be in weird headlines:

Woman tried to wear cheeseburger as sandal after having sex in Waffle House parking lot, Police say.

Such is the popularity of this story that it has pushed Blue Waffle down to Page 4 of Google's results for Waffle Sex. You really don't want to know about that! nooo

Even if it is a misogynist myth. Question
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website 
uair01Offline
Great Old One
Joined: 12 Apr 2005
Total posts: 1198
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 17-11-2013 12:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

A Dutch trolling site has found this strange house in Gouda:
http://www.geenstijl.nl/mt/archieven/2013/11/epic_pornopaleis_te_koop_voor.html

They call it a "porn palace", but I suspect it's just conspicuous consumption and bad taste. Worth a click though. Shocked
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website 
MythopoeikaOffline
Joined: 18 Sep 2001
Total posts: 9664
Gender: Unknown
PostPosted: 17-11-2013 12:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

uair01 wrote:
A Dutch trolling site has found this strange house in Gouda:
http://www.geenstijl.nl/mt/archieven/2013/11/epic_pornopaleis_te_koop_voor.html

They call it a "porn palace", but I suspect it's just conspicuous consumption and bad taste. Worth a click though. Shocked


Looks like the interior of many a mansion in this country.
Back to top
View user's profile 
rynner2Offline
What a Cad!
Joined: 13 Dec 2008
Total posts: 26169
Location: Under the moon
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 06-12-2013 10:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

What is the Telegraph coming to?! Shocked

Vaginas may be weird and hairy, but they certainly don’t need steaming
We’ve moved on from stripping our most sensitive regions of their natural hair, and have apparently started paying for vagina beauty treatments. Olivia Goldhill rounds up some of the most absurd products imaginable, including the vajacial
By Olivia Goldhill
3:45PM GMT 05 Dec 2013

In the good old days, all you needed to be ready for sex is two willing participants and a healthy dose of sexual chemistry.
Then pubic hair went out of fashion, and women suddenly had to start plucking, shaving, waxing, trimming away their natural state before copulation.

Now, it seems that vajacials are a thing. As in, facials, but for your vagina.
Apparently, these started off as a relatively simple affair in 2010, with a papaya enzyme mask, deep cleanse and tweezer hair extractions.
They’ve moved on though. Impossibly, beauticians have moved on from convincing women that a papaya-scented nether region is a necessary aspect of good sex, and have introduced a whole new range of vagina-themed beauty products.

Some women, before a big date or perhaps a romantic mini-break, actually book themselves in for a treatment of vaginal steaming.
Presumably, they sit back, spread their legs and allow steam to gently (I hope) cleanse their vagina. But what temperature is the steam, where (exactly) does it go, and how on earth is steam any better at cleaning than plain water?

The treatments are usually done a day or two after the woman's period ends, and "heals any imbalances" in the vagina. Which suggests I've been walking around with an unbalanced vagina for years.

Vaginoplasty is another trend, where you can shape your vagina into the desired shape. But what is this desired shape and who has a vagina that needs to be cosmetically re-modelled before sex? Poetry aside, vaginas are weird-looking things - they’re so un-pretty, I’m unsure what a “beautiful” vagina is supposed to look like. Perhaps we’ve been going overboard with the flower metaphors and some women actually want their vaginas to look like a rose.

Symmetry and neatness are listed as the longed-for traits, but this raises a whole new set of questions - is everyone else measuring their vaginas for perfect symmetry?

Now London’s getting in on America’s vaginal fashion trends, with salons offering "vaginal rejuvenation" for hundreds of pounds. Bad news for students then (and most other people), who will undoubtedly struggle to afford an appropriately-preened vagina. Maybe it can be a special treat that a couple saves up for once a year, when they can enjoy annual sex day with properly presented sexual organs.

The vagina is apparently rejuvenated by a costly serum, which was originally created to treat wounds, but has moved on to a new life sprucing up female genitals. Magically, this serum can improve "vaginal function" and "tighten and firm the vaginal walls".

I’m not surprised that these treatments exist, but I’m a little scared that women—even one, solitary woman—is paying for them.
There are women out there who are so anxious about what their partner will think about their vaginas, that they spend hundreds of pounds making them look “nice”.

But they need to stop this. They really do. No one envies the sex life of a woman complimented on her jojoba and rosemary scents. No one envies the sex life of a woman whose partner notices her jojoba and rosemary scents.

Vaginas are weird and they are hairy and that’s how they’re supposed to be. We need to stop worrying out what our poor vaginas look like during sex. It’s how they feel that really counts. OK?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/10498095/Vaginas-may-be-weird-and-hairy-but-they-certainly-dont-need-steaming-via-a-vajacial.html
Back to top
View user's profile 
Pietro_Mercurios
Heuristically Challenged
Gender: Unknown
PostPosted: 06-12-2013 12:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

Insecure people with more money than sense.
Back to top
View user's profile 
Father_TedOffline
Yeti
Joined: 02 May 2012
Total posts: 44
Location: Craggy Island
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 13-12-2013 15:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:

Man banned from every supermarket in Britain for masturbating in Sainsbury’s meat aisle

A man who was caught masturbating in the meat aisle of a Sainsbury's store has been banned from every supermarket in Britain - unless he is supervised by another adult.

Eugenio Freitas, 49, was captured pleasuring himself through his trousers for 10 minutes on CCTV cameras.

The married father of four went to the store in Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire “fully intending” to go shopping, but then became overwhelmed by his “excessive sexual drive”, a court heard.

Witnesses reported Freitas to staff at the local supermarket who phoned the police.

One staff member said she had noticed him loitering in the aisles before shoppers complained, but gave him the benefit of the doubt, believing he was simply “adjusting himself”.

Judge Paul Glenn told him: “These sort of offences cause distress and alarm.


Full Story: http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/man-banned-from-every-supermarket-in-britain-for-masturbating-in-sainsburys-meat-aisle-9003511.html

Man plays with the last turkey in the shop, in the shop and gets himself banned from every supermarket in Britaim. WTF!
Back to top
View user's profile 
OneWingedBirdOffline
Freelance Subversive
Joined: 19 Nov 2012
Total posts: 1870
Location: Attice of blinkey lights
Age: 45
Gender: Female
PostPosted: 13-12-2013 18:18    Post subject: Reply with quote

He sure knew how to beat the meat. Laughing
Back to top
View user's profile 
MythopoeikaOffline
Joined: 18 Sep 2001
Total posts: 9664
Gender: Unknown
PostPosted: 13-12-2013 19:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

Was he there to get some tenderloin? Smile
Back to top
View user's profile 
kamalktkOffline
Great Old One
Joined: 05 Feb 2011
Total posts: 982
Gender: Unknown
PostPosted: 13-12-2013 20:12    Post subject: Reply with quote

rynner2 wrote:
What is the Telegraph coming to?! Shocked

Vaginas may be weird and hairy, but they certainly don’t need steaming

By Olivia Goldhill
3:45PM GMT 05 Dec 2013
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/10498095/Vaginas-may-be-weird-and-hairy-but-they-certainly-dont-need-steaming-via-a-vajacial.html

Is Olivia aware that vaginas have no hair, they're the part that's on the inside? If it is hairy in there, you've got a problem.
Back to top
View user's profile 
Ronson8Offline
Things can only get better.
Joined: 31 Jul 2001
Total posts: 5945
Location: MK
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 13-12-2013 23:15    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're just splitting hairs. Smile
Back to top
View user's profile 
OneWingedBirdOffline
Freelance Subversive
Joined: 19 Nov 2012
Total posts: 1870
Location: Attice of blinkey lights
Age: 45
Gender: Female
PostPosted: 14-12-2013 11:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

I dare you to put "hair bearing vagina" into google.
Back to top
View user's profile 
CochiseOffline
Great Old One
Joined: 17 Jun 2011
Total posts: 1845
Location: Gwynedd, Wales
Age: 59
Gender: Male
PostPosted: 15-12-2013 11:52    Post subject: Reply with quote

Pietro_Mercurios wrote:
Insecure people with more money than sense.


It seems that, despite feminism, pretty much every media outlet and advertising campaign in the land is aimed at making women feel insecure to extract money from them. If I was a woman I think I'd be in a permanent state of outrage - but then presumably if I was a woman I'd be susceptible to the propaganda.

I even wonder if the media concentrate on sexual abuse of women to hide the fact that they all indulge in mental abuse of women for financial gain.

My missus was largely immune - she felt if you don't put all that chemical slap on your face all your life you won't need any anti-wrinkle cream (and she didn't) - but it even got to her from time to time. Usually when they shrunk the size of clothes or the range stocked in normal stores even further.

It's all utterly cynical and it can't be anything but deliberate.
Back to top
View user's profile 
ZoffreOffline
Joined: 23 Nov 2002
Total posts: 590
PostPosted: 15-12-2013 16:52    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cochise wrote:
It seems that, despite feminism, pretty much every media outlet and advertising campaign in the land is aimed at making women feel insecure to extract money from them. If I was a woman I think I'd be in a permanent state of outrage - but then presumably if I was a woman I'd be susceptible to the propaganda.

Yes, advertising is designed to prey upon people's insecurities and make them think that everyone else is living a life of perfect hair, face, makeup and now vaginal beauty, and that they're the odd one out. With these particular treatments, however, I think a huge factor is also some people's need for conspicuous consumption. They feel that if they are spending hundreds of pounds on this crap then they have attained a certain social standing or become a member of some kind of ephemeral clique. It almost doesn't matter what the product/treatment is, in fact the more indefinite and dubious the better, because it all adds to the faux 'mystique' and exclusivity of the whole thing.

There are indeed lots of women who subscribe to this model of behaviour, and I think it's extremely shallow and ultimately quite psychologically damaging. However, the vast majority of women think it's a load of cobblers and have a healthy chuckle at the whole thing. Razz
Back to top
View user's profile 
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Fortean Times Message Board Forum Index -> The Human Condition All times are GMT
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 10, 11, 12 ... 23, 24, 25  Next
Page 11 of 25

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group